David Joe Shideler...You can ask many people and they will tell you I have very good long term memory...especially when it comes to high school and college reminiscing. My short term memory though...not so much! There are a couple of reasons that in the last year and a half my thoughts have turned to Joe Shideler. First, having started to work on the 50th reunion, I wanted those long term neurons to really be firing so I could be at my best in remembering all those voices, names, good decisions, and more probably, immature and stupid actions and decisions from the past. Joe is a part of pretty much all of the above. Secondly, I was doing some remodeling on my house at the beginning of this year and was cleaning out a desk that I really hadn't used for a very long time. I opened up the large drawer and there it was. As I was swimming through the mess, pitching junk as I went, there was the extraordinarily innocent 8x10 color senior picture of Joe Shideler. We had been good friends and saw each other, on and off, for the five years Joe went to school in Ashland. I had forgotten that we had made and exchanged our senior pictures with each other...talk about a shower of emotions!
You see, I can remember the very first time I met the new kid who had moved from Kansas and began his eighth grade year at the Ashland Junior High School. The rumors were around that this big, amazing football player was the new kid on the block and all of a sudden there I was standing in front of him and being introduced to him right in front of Mr. McFarlin's math class. He was a really big guy for his age, but what I remember so much was how kind and shy he seemed, especially since at his age and if the rumors were true, I guess I expected him to kind of swagger in filled with arrogance and ready to take over. Not only was that not true of Joe then, but as long as I knew Joe--and by the way the rumors were true~he was an exceptional football player as well as basketball and track star, but he was as humble and as kind a person as he was a talented athlete.
I really enjoyed hanging out with him. I liked watching him play, talking about the game afterwards, and yes, even playing basketball with him. He was almost like another brother, but one that didn't mind being around me. The prom, graduation, came and went, I chose Ohio University, Joe received a scholarship to play football at Kansas University and we grew apart. At one point during college, Joe was home and my parents actually gave Joe our family car to come down and pick me up from school. I don't know what was going on in his life, but he seemed to be confused about what he wanted to do.
I never really saw Joe nor did I talk with him to any extent after that. As most did, however, he fell in love and eventually married, had children, moved to Atlanta, got a job, and settled down. I believe I saw him briefly just once at a reunion, and thought later on...what a really great guy and friend Joe had been to me, and it hit me that we could always be friends, and be there for each other, but that was not to be.
Many, many years later, I was teaching at our very own AHS, and I got a call during lunch from the main office telling me there was a call for me. We didn't have phones in our rooms at the time, and it was very strange to get a call during the school day. I said, "Hello," and this voice said, "Pammy, it's Joe." I just about dropped the phone. I really can't even remember what we talked about...I'm sure it was a little awkward, but we were still able to talk and say some things from the past that made Joe laugh, and Joe had a great laugh. I can't really explain it, but for such a big masculine guy, it was kind of a giggle that raised in key the harder he laughed. I liked it though. We ended the call after about 20 minutes, and I do remember we promised to stay in touch and we would always remain friends.
It wasn't very long after that last call with Joe that I got a call in the summer from Mr. Bush, who was a friend of Joe's family. He told me that Joe had been driving on an Atlanta highway during the rain, and that his car hydroplaned, hit a guardrail, and Joe was killed instantly. Stunned, unbelieving, and eventually grief took over that this could have happened to my friend. My thoughts immediately went to Joe's family, but also back to that call so recent where we had promised to remain in touch and stay friends. I realized that promise was never going to be able to be broken or kept, but I also knew I would never forget my friend, Joe.
For those who never had the chance to know Joe, there was never a guy I knew who was more liked and admired by his teammates (and my parents), who was more unassuming of his gifts as an athlete, who liked to have a good time, who was more of a gentleman and respected by all who knew him, and who should be here wilh us for this 50th special occasion.
I, and so many of us miss you, Joe, and I wish you were here so I could make you laugh and hear that big, goofy giggle just one more time!
A wonderful tribute Pam, at times your stream of consciousness style made me think I had unknowingly switched over to reading "The Jilting of Granny Weatherall".
I’ve never forgotten that during my last week at AHS, Joe made a real effort to track me down and tell me that I would be missed. He knew what it was like to switch schools. But your comments reminded me of something long forgotten. That my connection with Joe went all the way back to that first day of Bob McFarlin’s 8th grade math class, where we had desks next to each other.
I too remember the always smiling, happy, friendly Joe Shideler. What a great friend, I feel blessed to have known him and relish the time we spent talking at the 20th reunion.
What great posts about Joe! I have loved reading everyone's memories of him, recalling what a wonderful person he was. And yes, Pam, I am one that will attest to your amazing long term memory! You must have more neurons firing ... I'm jealous! We should visit his grave sometime when you are visiting in Atlanta. I didn't realize he was buried near Stone Mountain. Thanks for that information, Dave. Joe will be remembered for a very long time.
Thanks to all for their posting about Joe. Joe and I became friends late in our High School career. Our friendship grew over the subsequent years. Joe's mom Faye lived on Garmon Street and Faye became good friends with neighbor Gloria Lefever. When Faye moved to Florida, Joe stayed in Ashland and I believe Gloria was tasked to "keep and eye on Joe." Joe, Dave Vanosdall and I spent a lot of time at Gloria's house. She was known forever as Big G. Big G would feed us, may have served us some drinks and we would play wiffle ball home run derby with Big G's son Jimmy. Our special card game was spades. I know this might sound embarrassing but those few drinks were pink squirrels and grasshoppers, real manly drinks! When Becky and I married Joe was our best man. Because of his Marine training we marched into Dillon's at my bachelor party. We were quickly marched right back out! A few years later Joe married Martha Tolbert and I served as a groomsman. We vacationed together, going to Disney World. I will never ride the Tea Cups again, bad experience with a maniac like Joe, When we both started having kids we kept in touch. Becky's parents lived on the west coast of Florida. We would drive to see them twice a year, and on the way home,we would head east to see Joe and his family. When Joe moved to Stone Mountain we would stop on our way home for an overnight. And yes, he made us climb Stone Mountain! Joe left us way too soon. I have asked Martha to send some more information that I thought some of his closer friends might want to know about Joe's life after Ashland. I will forward that soon.
The following has been submitted by Martha in her words concening Joe's life after Ashland.
Hey Mike,
Sorry it has taken me so long to get back with you. Here is what I came up with on my trip down memory lane.
After graduating from high school Joe went to the University of Kansas on a football scholarship. During that time he was in the ROTC program. Upon graduating from college he went straight into the Marines as a 1st Lt. He had a top security clearance with the CIA and was promised a position with them after his 2 years was completed. Unfortunately, President Carter put a freeze on all hiring at that time and he did not get a job. He then came back to Florida to visit his mom which is where we met on a blind date. In March of 1976 we were married.
Joe worked as a manager for Burger King for several years. During this time he took a Dale Carnegie class on How To Win Friends and Influence People. He went on to be an assistant teacher for that course for the next 2 years. He left Burger KIng to go and work for UPS. He started out as a driver where he earned the nickname "Joe Jet" because he was always in a hurry to get his packages delivered in the time frame that was allotted. After a few years he went into a management position. During this time frame we had 2 children, Jeff and then Jodi.
Joe loved to play golf. He also tried his best to become a handyman around the house. Unfortunately he did not have the best of luck in that department. After putting an ax in the top of his foot and a drill bit through his hand we decided it was cheaper to pay someone to do things around the house! It also saved us money in trips to the ER! He had a deep love for history. Because of this we owned every set of Time Life Books that had anything to do with history. One of his favorite things to do was to ask you if you knew what had happened on a certain day and year in history and then proceed to tell you about it. He would have been an awesome history teacher! He loved music but couldn't carry a tune! This did not stop him from singing though! He also would umpire Little League baseball games.
We decided to make a move to Georgia in 1988. He then became a mortgage loan officer. He loved this job and was very successful at it. If you ever came to visit us in Georgia, Joe insisted that everyone had to climb Stone Mountain whether you wanted to or not! He took up running so he could run in the Peach Tree Road Race every July 4th . He would train running around Stone Mountain Park with Jodi running with him or riding her bike along side of him. He ran the race for 2 years. He also was a ref for a church basketball league. He was deacon at our church.
One of the things Joe liked to do the most was eat! You didn't need a garbage disposal with Joe around! He had to eat so many leftovers growing up as a kid that he made sure we were never going to have anything left overs after a meal. His favorite question to ask people was if they knew that they could only have one last meal to eat before they died what would they choose. He always said he would choose a big juicy cheeseburger! Poor Joe did not get that wish or his last meal. He was on a diet and had tuna and cottage cheese for lunch that day! He was on his way to an appointment that day when his car hydroplaned in the rain and he hit a guard rail and was killed instantly on August14,1991.
His legacy lives on through his kids. Jeff has the same memory for things like Joe did and shares his love of sports,especially baseball. Jodi got her dads height. She is 6 ft.tall. She also loves music. She took up her dads love of running and ran cross country and did track in high school. He has 2 grandsons, Brady and Brett, who have never met him but know all about their Papa Joe! Brady actually looks a lot like Joe and has his love for football and basketball.
Not sure if this is what you wanted but I thought these were some things people might like to know. Jodi would like to know if Becky would video you when you are sharing about Joe. Looks like you all are enjoying your retirement and your grandkids!
Take Care,
Martha
I told Martha we would not be giving any presentation. I had a great phone conversation with her after receiving her thoughts. She just remarried this year. For you Buckeye fans, Joe played defense under John Cooper who was defensive coordinator at Kansas when Joe played. And yes Becky, our kids and I climbed Stone Mountain when we visited the Shids. See you soon at the reunion.
Pamela Leonard
David Joe Shideler...You can ask many people and they will tell you I have very good long term memory...especially when it comes to high school and college reminiscing. My short term memory though...not so much! There are a couple of reasons that in the last year and a half my thoughts have turned to Joe Shideler. First, having started to work on the 50th reunion, I wanted those long term neurons to really be firing so I could be at my best in remembering all those voices, names, good decisions, and more probably, immature and stupid actions and decisions from the past. Joe is a part of pretty much all of the above. Secondly, I was doing some remodeling on my house at the beginning of this year and was cleaning out a desk that I really hadn't used for a very long time. I opened up the large drawer and there it was. As I was swimming through the mess, pitching junk as I went, there was the extraordinarily innocent 8x10 color senior picture of Joe Shideler. We had been good friends and saw each other, on and off, for the five years Joe went to school in Ashland. I had forgotten that we had made and exchanged our senior pictures with each other...talk about a shower of emotions!
You see, I can remember the very first time I met the new kid who had moved from Kansas and began his eighth grade year at the Ashland Junior High School. The rumors were around that this big, amazing football player was the new kid on the block and all of a sudden there I was standing in front of him and being introduced to him right in front of Mr. McFarlin's math class. He was a really big guy for his age, but what I remember so much was how kind and shy he seemed, especially since at his age and if the rumors were true, I guess I expected him to kind of swagger in filled with arrogance and ready to take over. Not only was that not true of Joe then, but as long as I knew Joe--and by the way the rumors were true~he was an exceptional football player as well as basketball and track star, but he was as humble and as kind a person as he was a talented athlete.
I really enjoyed hanging out with him. I liked watching him play, talking about the game afterwards, and yes, even playing basketball with him. He was almost like another brother, but one that didn't mind being around me. The prom, graduation, came and went, I chose Ohio University, Joe received a scholarship to play football at Kansas University and we grew apart. At one point during college, Joe was home and my parents actually gave Joe our family car to come down and pick me up from school. I don't know what was going on in his life, but he seemed to be confused about what he wanted to do.
I never really saw Joe nor did I talk with him to any extent after that. As most did, however, he fell in love and eventually married, had children, moved to Atlanta, got a job, and settled down. I believe I saw him briefly just once at a reunion, and thought later on...what a really great guy and friend Joe had been to me, and it hit me that we could always be friends, and be there for each other, but that was not to be.
Many, many years later, I was teaching at our very own AHS, and I got a call during lunch from the main office telling me there was a call for me. We didn't have phones in our rooms at the time, and it was very strange to get a call during the school day. I said, "Hello," and this voice said, "Pammy, it's Joe." I just about dropped the phone. I really can't even remember what we talked about...I'm sure it was a little awkward, but we were still able to talk and say some things from the past that made Joe laugh, and Joe had a great laugh. I can't really explain it, but for such a big masculine guy, it was kind of a giggle that raised in key the harder he laughed. I liked it though. We ended the call after about 20 minutes, and I do remember we promised to stay in touch and we would always remain friends.
It wasn't very long after that last call with Joe that I got a call in the summer from Mr. Bush, who was a friend of Joe's family. He told me that Joe had been driving on an Atlanta highway during the rain, and that his car hydroplaned, hit a guardrail, and Joe was killed instantly. Stunned, unbelieving, and eventually grief took over that this could have happened to my friend. My thoughts immediately went to Joe's family, but also back to that call so recent where we had promised to remain in touch and stay friends. I realized that promise was never going to be able to be broken or kept, but I also knew I would never forget my friend, Joe.
For those who never had the chance to know Joe, there was never a guy I knew who was more liked and admired by his teammates (and my parents), who was more unassuming of his gifts as an athlete, who liked to have a good time, who was more of a gentleman and respected by all who knew him, and who should be here wilh us for this 50th special occasion.
I, and so many of us miss you, Joe, and I wish you were here so I could make you laugh and hear that big, goofy giggle just one more time!
Your Friend Always, Pam
Jeff Ewing
A wonderful tribute Pam, at times your stream of consciousness style made me think I had unknowingly switched over to reading "The Jilting of Granny Weatherall".
I’ve never forgotten that during my last week at AHS, Joe made a real effort to track me down and tell me that I would be missed. He knew what it was like to switch schools. But your comments reminded me of something long forgotten. That my connection with Joe went all the way back to that first day of Bob McFarlin’s 8th grade math class, where we had desks next to each other.
Kerry McGinty (Sadler)
I too remember the always smiling, happy, friendly Joe Shideler. What a great friend, I feel blessed to have known him and relish the time we spent talking at the 20th reunion.
Dave Koehler
Pamela Leonard
Dave, Where is Joe's memorial plaque located?
Dave Koehler
Pam, in Melwood Cemetery, Stone Mountain, Georgia just outside Atlanta.
Barb Rogers (Denbow)
What great posts about Joe! I have loved reading everyone's memories of him, recalling what a wonderful person he was. And yes, Pam, I am one that will attest to your amazing long term memory! You must have more neurons firing ... I'm jealous! We should visit his grave sometime when you are visiting in Atlanta. I didn't realize he was buried near Stone Mountain. Thanks for that information, Dave. Joe will be remembered for a very long time.
Sue Shenberger (Pesci)
Joe was certainly one of the good guys. He was so friendly and sincere, a friend to all. Thanks to Dave for sharing his gravesite.
Mike Brucato
Thanks to all for their posting about Joe. Joe and I became friends late in our High School career. Our friendship grew over the subsequent years. Joe's mom Faye lived on Garmon Street and Faye became good friends with neighbor Gloria Lefever. When Faye moved to Florida, Joe stayed in Ashland and I believe Gloria was tasked to "keep and eye on Joe." Joe, Dave Vanosdall and I spent a lot of time at Gloria's house. She was known forever as Big G. Big G would feed us, may have served us some drinks and we would play wiffle ball home run derby with Big G's son Jimmy. Our special card game was spades. I know this might sound embarrassing but those few drinks were pink squirrels and grasshoppers, real manly drinks! When Becky and I married Joe was our best man. Because of his Marine training we marched into Dillon's at my bachelor party. We were quickly marched right back out! A few years later Joe married Martha Tolbert and I served as a groomsman. We vacationed together, going to Disney World. I will never ride the Tea Cups again, bad experience with a maniac like Joe, When we both started having kids we kept in touch. Becky's parents lived on the west coast of Florida. We would drive to see them twice a year, and on the way home,we would head east to see Joe and his family. When Joe moved to Stone Mountain we would stop on our way home for an overnight. And yes, he made us climb Stone Mountain! Joe left us way too soon. I have asked Martha to send some more information that I thought some of his closer friends might want to know about Joe's life after Ashland. I will forward that soon.
Mike Brucato
The following has been submitted by Martha in her words concening Joe's life after Ashland.
I told Martha we would not be giving any presentation. I had a great phone conversation with her after receiving her thoughts. She just remarried this year. For you Buckeye fans, Joe played defense under John Cooper who was defensive coordinator at Kansas when Joe played. And yes Becky, our kids and I climbed Stone Mountain when we visited the Shids. See you soon at the reunion.